Back in the days when this picture was taken I actually believed I could keep these two children not only fed and warm but safe. It didn't turn out quite that way but by then they were adults. I would have never imagined the conversation my daughter had with her son this afternoon. "Do you know what to do if you hear gun fire at school or at the mall?" Padyn replied, "yes mom, we have had drills at school. You get down right away and the teacher locks the door and you crawl where they can't see you from the door" and if they get through the door do you know what to do? "no mom, what do you do?" If you can't get out to run away you fall to the floor and pretend you're dead".
I feel like I'm in an alternative reality where this conversation is necessary. When did this happen, when did killing children become a way to make a point or become payback for some real or imagined slight? I lost a child but it was as a result of his own actions and that was hard enough. I can't imagine the pain of the parents who will be making phone calls to family instead of tucking their children into bed. I'm not sure how to deal with this level of evil. So I do the only thing I know how to do, I pray for the little ones who died, for the adults who died trying to save them and for all the people who go to bed tonight with massive holes in their hearts.
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